That doesn't go there!

Since we don't have a computer system for taking orders, everything is done by hand. As a consequence, pens are scattered liberally around the restaurant. They also have a habit of disappearing, since they're easy to pick up and slip into a pocket without thinking about it.

A few weeks ago, I saw a pen resting inside the cup in which we keep teaspoons. Bizarre, but not unfathomable: probably fell off a counter. I took the pen out of the cup and went about my business.

The next day, I found another pen there. Another accident? I again removed it.

And the next day, found another. Clearly, someone was doing this on purpose. But who would be dumb enough to store a pen inside a cup containing clean spoons? Was there actually a person cursed with stupidity of such a breathtaking scope that this would seem like a good idea?

Of course there was. "I didn't want to keep losing 'em," the Dumbest Waitress said.

I suggested keeping it a pocket. Or in, ya know, the cup we keep on the counter solely for the purpose of storing pens. This cup is all of three feet away from the teaspoons.

I guess she took my advice, though. I've found a pen there every day for the last week, and learned that my fellow coworkers have been doing it themselves, just so I would see it and get angry. Feel the love!