Congratulations, you have brain cancer

[Turns out the Mon-Wed-Fri schedule doesn't really work for me. So now it's Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday.]

Ever seen Memento? The main character has this...condition. Since his accident he can't remember anything. It's not amnesia -- he knows who he is, knows all about himself. But he can't make new memories. After a few minutes, everything just...fades.

Our customers have been hit with this same condition. Maybe it's something in the water.

"Do you have hot wings?"
"Yes, we do."
"I'll take an order of wings. Non-spicy, please."
"I'm sorry, we only have spicy."
"You only have spicy?"
"Yes, sir. We only have the one kind."
"Hmm. Do you have mild wings, then?"

What did I just fucking say?

"Thank you for calling Pizza Place, can I help you?"
"Do you have that [latest advertised special for Pizza Conglomerate]."
"No, ma'am, that's Pizza Conglomerate."
"Oh -- where is this?"

What did I just fucking say?

Mini Boss and I devised a way to deal with these people. The following script:

"Sir/Ma'am, I answered the question you just asked me seven seconds ago. If you can repeat it back to me, you win a free pizza. If you can't remember what happen less than ten seconds in your past, I'm sorry, but you have a very serious neurological condition and should see a specialist immediately."

If only we could get away with it.

"Do you have any specials?"
"We have two large pizzas for $19.99."
"Hmm. Do you have anything for two large pizzas?"

Gaa!